HAPPY BIRTHDAY, NEIL YOUNG! YOU'RE OUR CELL PHONE CONCERT PHOTO OF THE WEEK! THAT IS YOU, RIGHT?11/12/2013
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VETERANS DAY MOVIE MARATHON ON ME FIRST TV! BRING RATIONS OF POPCORN AND GOOD 'N' PLENTY!11/11/2013 Me First TV is saluting Veterans Day with a 24 hour war movie marathon because there's nothing a war veteran wants more than to watch hour after hour of films dedicated to bringing back memories of traumatic events and military bureaucracy. It all starts at 6 am with a salute to World War 2, Take That Hitler, starring Van Heflin, Tom Jefferson, and Betty Bouncy and the All Girl Army Band singing their hit song from 1941, "You Nazi Us Coming". At 8 am, it's four hours of unreleased USO films found in a flooded basement of a guy who promised to keep them for Frank Capra, "Thanks, Yanks, You're The Best", "Red Tape Escape", "Smell That Liberty", and, "Va Va Voom, It's A Woman in Uniform!" are just some of the movies that Capra made in one take for the military and to finish a contractual obligation he couldn't get out of at the time. Noon to 8 pm, enjoy movies starring guys named Dirk and Deke, starting with "Battlebuds" a screwball comic salute to two practical joking privates who can't help laughing at the Japs and Mussolini, "War Fighters" with Dirk Bogarde and Deke Duncan, "Soldier Sarge Serves Up Justice" starring Dirk Benedict and Deke Daniels, and, finally, "GI Joe Meets To Jo", starring Dirk Banders and Deke Denson, with actual footage of To Jo, edited in for good measure. 8 to midnight, it's Asian War Salute, starting with "See ya, Korea" starring Jeff Jackson, Sue Simmons and funny man, Silly Gillikens in a madcap romp through the war that everybody forgets in history class, followed by "That's Vietnam!" a Hollywood blockbuster that is really just a filmclip anthology of every film made about 'Nam and featuring a soundtrack that you probably already own. The marathon ends from Midnight to 6 am with that one Clint Eastwood movie that got great reviews but is almost impossible to watch in one sitting, you know, let's call it "Flags of Interest"starring an all foreign cast that thought it was getting it's citizenship papers, subtitles that have the wrong translations, and squinty-eyed warriors who aren't about to pay union scale to any of the actors. The entire day comes to a fitting conclusion with a salute to the war in Afghanistan called"We're Still Here" featuring the pirate leader from Captain Phillips, and that new guy all the kids are talking about, It's all on Me First TV, today. Happy Veterans Day, America, now go watch some movies. From The Olinoy Reporter Photo Features Supplement of Sunday, November 3, 2013. The Olinoy area was proud to host the first annual November Nature Walk Poetry Contest at the Log and Bog Forest Preserve in unincorporated Glen Burgs Patch. The contest was open to some of the areas finest authors to ply their trade at offering a few thoughts on the beauty that surrounds us this November. Here are the first and second place entries: Brown Gold Flower Picture -1st prize by Pete Doheny Brown Gold Flower Picture Photo of a plant that has those colors November notices you in passing You bow your head in thanksgiving For all the Veterans who have passed before And elected you to take the office of brown gold flower picture You are a sign that November has 30 days And one of those is my sister's birthday. Yeah, that got first prize. This is what happens when you have ten entries and all of them are taking a writing class at the library called Poetry and Pictures: The reason why your friends haven't called lately. Here is the runner up: Runner Up Poem For A Fall Photo by Sarah Jean Lane Runner up poem for a fall photo You finished second, oh no I thought you were going to win I rushed to get your entry in What to say, where to begin Like leaves falling in slow mo You landed softly on my cocoa Sappy Maple Syrup No No Runner up poem for a fall photo The Olinoy Art Commission is rethinking the poetry contest for next year and may opt instead for a rotten pumpkin eating contest. If you have some other ideas for next fall , please send them to: Olinoy November Nature Walk Ideas c/o The Olinoy Art Commission Pete Doheny- Acting and Artistic Director Olinoy, IL 60000-000- HELP Americans used the power of the poll and the voting booth to change history, if by changing history you mean deciding that history should record the story of man and women with a sleepy fact checker and an outdated Underwood typewriter. Yes, Americans, you elected all kinds of people yesterday. Some of them will make a difference and some of them won't know the difference between politics and facial tics. One thing you can count on, Americans, all of these people will get better health care than you. Like, free health care. Like no co-pay. Like no Cobra. You know, better health care than you. This has been a message from the Duck Logic Commission on Voting Realities. Keeping it real for voters who don't have the time to keep it real themselves. LOOK WHAT'S COMING TO THE DUCK LOGIC WAREHOUSE! If you like sitting around the house in your underwear watching anything that passes for entertainment while eating bags of chips and barely engaging in life, you're gonna love our new line of Inaction Figures. You get Big Belly Billy alreadty with stain encrusted undershirt and unbuttoned blue jeans. How about Unmotivated Man , complete with list of excuses for not following up on anything and a string that you can pull to hear him say his catch phrases like "I'll get to it later", "After the (fill in the blank) is over", and "I'm gonna need a ride"? Finally, pick up our newest Inaction Figure, Lisa Lazy Teen, now with extra accessories including constant smirk, inaudible mumblings, and unfinished homework. All part of the Inaction Figures, part of the new Duck Logic Warehouse Wonders series. If it isn't at the Duck Logic Warehouse, it's probably on it's way or just delayed for some reason! |
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